Look to the future (toungue in cheek)

This article has been shamelessly nicked from here and here, I think it is excellent :-)

Having Children "Could be a cover for child abuse", say DCSF 17-01-2050

"I'm sure some parents are adequate", said a minister yesterday, " but we are concerned that the majority simply aren't helping our children achieve their full potential, and in many cases, parenting may even be a cover for child abuse. Untrained, unvetted 'biological' parents are quite clearly no substitute for properly qualified childcare experts"

The Department proposes that all children should be removed from the 'mother', or incubator as is now the preferred term, at birth and placed in special child rearing units until they are ready to enter the workforce. " This will be good for parents too; they will be freed from the onerous duty of childcare ( known to cause stress, sleeplessness, palpitations and obesity ) and will be able to use their Time ((c)Tesco 2020) more efficiently for the benefit of the Global Economy."

Children's supercharity BarnardoSPCC concurred with the governments findings. "When you think of all the dangerous thing we used to allow ; summer holidays, Easter break, and God ((c) Tesco 2034) forbid, home education – it's a wonder any of us survived. It's terrifying to think what fate could befall a child whilst not under state surveillance" said a spokeswoman "Just think what those poor innocent children had to endure – disgusting sexual abuses such as 'tickling' and 'cuddling' at the hands of callous parents! We welcome these proposals; in fact we would suggest they do not go far enough. The incubation period is still a very risky time for the developing child; we would like to see more research into how we can get around this process."

A Civil Rights ((c) Tesco 2018) campaigner claimed " This is absolutely outra..." before being arrested under section 985 of the Terrorism (2022) act and summarily shot.